I don't mean to say that my life is perfect because it most definitely isn't. What I am trying to say is that when we are used to getting what we want, we begin to see spontaneous blessings from Heaven as trials. Let me explain.
A few months ago I was hired to teach at BYU-Idaho in the English department as an adjunct professor. I was very excited and very nervous for this opportunity. I had been hoping to get this job ever since I finished my student teaching in the Spring of 2013. I didn't know if I would qualify, however, since I don't have a master's degree. Anyway, I did get the job and everything seemed to be hunky dorey. Then summer hit and everything got a little crazy: weddings, reunions, family trips, birthdays, girls camp, and canning. On top of all of this, we decided it would be best to rent a house with my parents in order to ease the burdens placed on my dad and my younger sister. Between looking for a house, being a mom, a wife, a teacher in preparation, and everything else, it was hard to stay sane. I was feeling a little overwhelmed to say the least. And then it came, out of the blue, I am Pregnant! What!? How on earth did this happen? I really didn't think I was going to make it through the year alive. I felt like this was the last straw. I couldn't help but feel that Heavenly Father was trying to see just how far He could push me. I cried... a lot. I didn't feel well, and I wasn't sure if I could do it all. That's when I realized that I was looking at it all wrong. I was sitting in Young Women's last Sunday and the lesson was on families. We talked about the importance of being mothers in Zion and raising righteous, faithful children. A story was shared about a girl who was smart and talented and she chose motherhood over a career. Her leaders and teachers told her she was wasting her gifts. When I heard this story, I was appalled. I couldn't believe that someone would feel that way about motherhood. And then I realized that I was being that person in my own way. I was the person who felt like being a mother and expecting another precious child was a trial, an extra burden for me to bear. When in reality, this is my purpose. Being a mother is what I came here to do. Sure I can be a teacher and help and serve those around me, but in the end, the most important thing I can do is to help raise the next generation. My burden/trial wasn't a trial at all. Although being sick and tired all the time really isn't any fun, I am excited to be a mother of two. I am happy that my body is healthy and capable of bearing children. What a marvelous gift I have been given. I only hope I can be worthy of it.
